Resentment

As moms of young children, we also tend to feel resentment a lot. Kids require a lot of work. Like a LOT of work! And who is doing all that work for them? All day (and all night sometimes!) young children have a lot of needs and most of them require the help of someone else. So who is responsible for meeting those needs? The brunt of that responsibility tends to lie on us as the mothers. But when there is also a father around, we get into resentment traps thinking that he should be doing this or he should be like that to help out more. 

Resentment is a feeling that comes when we don’t meet our own needs. If we are relying on anyone else to manage our feelings for us, and they don’t do it just like we want them to, we feel resentment. 

As always, feelings come from thoughts so when I’m thinking that “it’s so not fair that I have to always be the default to do everything around here” I’ll feel resentment towards my husband who I am thinking needs to be doing more to help out with these children that he is responsible for also. 

So, it’s always an exercise in figuring out what are the thoughts that lead to this resentment and question all of those thoughts. What are my needs that are not being met and how can I take responsibility for meeting those needs instead of just being mad at others for them not doing it. So let’s start examining our own thoughts and take charge of changing them so that we can have the result we want of a unified marriage to take care of our kids together in peace and harmony.