Let other people help you
Let other people help you. There’s no shame in that! We used to be tribal creatures. Parenting was a group effort. We live more secluded lives now and think that we can and should do it all. But we can’t and we don’t. I just sent my son out the door to school with our neighbor friends with instructions to ride home with them also because it will probably be raining after school so he doesn’t have to walk in the rain. And he said “can’t you pick us up sometimes?” “Yeah buddy, i could but i’m about to have a baby so let’s let people help us, okay?” It is honestly still hard for me to let other people help. My brain wants to give me thoughts right now that I could be driving him myself (which also includes waking up all three sleeping girls upstairs and hauling them with us for a two minute drive) instead of writing this blog. The neighbor friend has four littles also. Why is she so much more able than me? etc etc. But i manage my brain in order to manage my emotions and my energy. If she is willing and able, i will just be over joyed and grateful to let her help! This is the season of people offering help, the brand new baby stage. She’s due this week and lots of people have offered help. I’m not sure what i need help with (even after doing this four times already) so I usually say thank you but that’s where it ends. If someone offers something specific, i sure don’t turn it down. Yes please bring me dinner thank you so much. But my brain can’t even think of something to ask for. Maybe help cleaning my kitchen? I could say that next time 😆
Anyway, this is just another area that we busy independent moms struggle with to drop the mom guilt. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you if you need help. Or even if you don’t need it. If you just want it. More power to you, momma! I hauled around the three girls for way too long to take my son to our old school the past couple years before i finally accepted help and all of a sudden i found some of my sanity back after I let someone else drive my son. And it seriously is no big deal for them! They are going that way anyway. And it gives other people a chance to serve us which benefits them. So it’s a win win situation all around! I have a dear friend who is also approaching the end of her pregnancy and has a couple young kids already and all of them were sick the other week and she was telling me how hard it was for her to accept the help that her neighbor was offering. She wants to always be the giving one. She usually is. But this time it was her turn to take care of herself and her littles through the sickness and graciously accept dinner from her sister friend.
Let go of the guilt that comes from thinking that you have to do it all yourself. You definitely don’t. We’re here to help each other. That means you get your turn to be helped also, it doesn’t make you any less Super Mom! It’s actually just another super power in your quiver to be humble enough to accept help. Makes you even more of a hero. We’ve got this! Together Each Achieves More! Go TEAM!
